Talkin’ ’bout my GenerationX

Retirement is a word which means nothing to us…we’re going to die on the job and we know it.

I’m kind of here and I’m kind of not.  Dimensionally speaking, it’s the Phantom Zone.

Who’s Mr. Grumpy Gills?

Or something like that.  Remember that line from the movie Saving Nemo?  It’s Dori…remember Dori?

So Dori’s a ding-a-ling fish with memory problems and.  Bah, you’ve seen it. Well,the guy who plays Marlin (Albert Brooks) is a grumpy guy who, for no other reason, is the voice of GenX.

GenX – a group of grumpy malcontents born ’round 1964-1984.

The GenXers are smooshed between the Baby Boomers (very famous) and GenY (almost as famous).  GenX is kind of lost between the two because of the size of the Boomers and GenY.  Basically, GenX is not statistically important enough to marketers to rate highly.  Boomers and GenY are HUGE marketing opportunities and because of their large size they appear more often, or more often positively, in the media.  GenX are, well, Albert Brooks.

Albert Brooks possesses that tone of voice which IS the GenX condition.  Bitter, tired, cynical and a heaping tablespoon of  “LEAVE ME ALONE!”.  That is GenX.

Funny thing is that GenX is pretty nifty.  Sure, this is what stunk during our lives:

  • Reagan
  • Just Say No
  • Divorce
  • Economic Decline
  • Baby Boomers
  • No Job Prospects
  • Educational Debt

And that’s just a small sampling.  But there are some kick-ass things which GenX did which aren’t truly accounted for…ever.

  • Computer Mastery
  • Technological Prowess
  • Frugality
  • Communal Spirit (slightly bitter)
  • Individuality
  • Endurance

And I think it’s that last one which needs to be address today: endurance.

GenX are the modern Jews wandering the desert of blech.  We will make sure that wherever we wander there’s going to be a SBX or an Intelligencia Coffee somewhere nearby, but GenX IS the wandering tribe looking for our home. And we will forever BE that wandering tribe.

We wander from job to job looking for consistency and continuity but find that it really doesn’t exist.  We wander from experience from experience trying to find that one crystalline, pure nugget of experience which will give us the glorious self-insight that the Boomers and GenY seem to possess.  We wander and wonder a LOT about where the world is going and how we’re going to fit into it.

Do you see?  We’re searchers, never locking down into one thing.  We’re never satisfied with the status quo becuase, well, whatever’s over that NEXT hill looks pretty darn enticing.  And if I can’t ride there in your Honda Element, well then I can just strap on these Tevas and walk on over to it…whatever IT may be.

We were also the first to discover and embrace in-security.  We very much realize that there IS no security in our world.  People who hate the US might knock over a building or two; companies might jettison an entire town full of employees because there’s a bunch of really smart Indians near Bangalore who will work for 80% less.  We understand that we have NO CONTROL over our own bodies because, well if you’ve ever been through a TSA checkpoint or gotten screwed over by your health insurance company lately, you get the point.

We live with this each day.  Our ability to grasp and embrace the ether is our greatest asset.  We can thrive anywhere, a potted plant in sand.  We’re just there and keeping at it – constant growth in some fashion or another.

The part that really cracks me up is this: that I will never be allowed to retire.  I’m not wealthy enough…my 401K is a FUCKING JOKE (thanks Wall Street) and I’ll have to keep pushing until the day I keel over at this stupid keyboard.  Of course my company will buy me a new keyboard whenever I want as long as I keep typing and working…hooray.

When I’m 85 I’m going to take the remaining 3.64 days of my vacation and go the the Rocky Mountains with a case of Bourbon, some Hustlers (I like the articles) and my Spotify player and I’ll find a nice place to drink, expose myself to the elements and pass away.  Seriously.  There is NO WAY that, at the pace we’re going, that any of us will be able to afford to retire.  And we’re living longer and longer (not better and better) so we’ll all reach 100 years old, look at one another, shrug and ask “well, what the hell should we do now?”

I’ve got a lot of years left to go and I’ll manage to get by – heck, I’ve even got a BIG PLAN up my sleeve – we’ll see.  The kids will grow into decent people and we’ll have to keep our eyes sharp to see what new and cool things occur.  Personally, I’m hoping the Vulcans arrive soon with replicators (not the SG1 type either).

GenX is the survivor, not the complainer.  We’ll never get the time to enjoy ourselves like everybody else (’cause why would a whiner have any fun in the first place?) but we’ll shut-up and keep plugging away into the future.

Now, if the rest of the world would just shut up and watch us.  We’ve TOTALLY got this shit wired.

My man Rollins:

And still we endure…



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